Child sexual abuse is similar to any other form of physical attack – it involves violence. The victims of this type of crime experience long-term effects and trauma that can actually ruin their entire lives. Being sexually abused as a child means that the victim is subjected to an act of aggression that utilizes power and manipulation. It is a classic symbol of the powerful overcoming the weak. The two main motivational factors of child sexual abuse are the desire to satisfy a sexual need and the need to exercise control over the victims as a showcase of power and authority. sexually assaulted hamilton

While most of us view the victims of child sexual abuse as the ones who suffer the most, the way society views them may not be the same. Social and cultural norms these days consider child sexual abuse a taboo, but why do some people put the blame on the victims?

Various studies have been made detailing several scenarios where accusations of child sexual abuse were concealed and the alleged victims are either blamed, suspected of lying, or simply criticized. Although sexually abusing a child breaks every single rule of morality, there is still an ongoing trend of denial, minimization and suppression from the family of the victim, authorities, and the society in general. sexual abuse helpline

The main reason why society reacts differently in child sexual abuse cases is because there are several factors that come in. For instance, the kind of response from a specific allegation may entail different consequences not only for the victim, but for the family, neighborhood, town, and the society as a whole. Supposed your child accuses the resident priest in your church of molestation, how would the entire congregation react to it? Are you sure other church members will support your child or are they going to take the side of the priest?

Apart from the example given above, another scenario is when the abuse happens within the family. There have been thousands of reported cases of intra-familial abuse. However, there is also the same number of abuses within the family that hasn’t been disclosed or revealed. The reason for this is that many families prefer to conceal the abuse since telling the public about it will only embarrass and taint the image and reputation of the entire clan. It will surely result to embarrassment and negative perception towards the other members of the family. have I been assaulted

Unfortunately, in this type of scene, it is the child victim who suffers the most. The denial of the family will only result to never ending trauma and negative effects towards the victim. He will certainly live a life that’s full of misery and pain – not to mention the resulting physical and psychological disorders brought about by the effects of non-disclosure and concealment of the crime.

Another reason why there is a continuing denial and rejection of child sexual abuse allegations is the fact that society and the public in general do not want to accept the crime of child sexual abuse as being prevalent. A few decades back, families in the United States don’t think that their children were at a constant risk of being victimized by pedophiles and sex offenders. But if we look at the numbers today, it is clear that the cases and accusations aren’t isolated anymore. But a lot of parents still don’t want to take it seriously since it will only cast fear and anxiety to the entire family. ptsd sexual abuse

Finally, the issue of child sexual abuse definitely involves a lot of emotions like fear, anger, embarrassment, and others. Because of this, there are actually a lot at stake whenever someone accuses a person of the crime, especially when that person is a notable and respected member of the society. Thus, we have to accept the fact that the society’s response to child sexual abuse will always be dependent on the other consequences instead of providing the victim justice and healing.

A lot of times, child sexual abuse victims use coping strategies to fight off the trauma and negative effects. While those effects vary and may be distinct to each victim, what’s most obvious is the fact that many of them still did not succeed in the process of healing. Sadly, a great number of those victims live a life full of pain, misery, and suffering from the sexual abuse they experienced many years back. sexually assaulted hamilton

One of the coping strategies used by therapists and counselors is the enhancement and development of self-esteem and confidence on the part of the victims. As you can see, being a victim of child sexual abuse means losing almost your entire self, including the personality, innocence, positive outlook in life, hopes and dreams, and others. But by restoring the confidence and self-esteem you once have prior to the experience, there’s a great chance you’ll heal faster. But, is it really true?

Positive statements about oneself may be a good way of boosting self-esteem and confidence. But it is really not an effective way of completely healing the wounds of child sexual abuse. Most of the time victims who strive hard in talking their way out just to feel better usually manifest long term effects of the abuse. What happens is they are trying to turn their backs on reality. By feeling and talking positive, they are in a state of denial. They begin to refuse and reject what has actually happened to them. sexual abuse helpline

While being confident may temporarily give them the ability to forget the experience, it will never be erased. By the time they feel lonely, miserable, and alone; all those bad memories start to sink in again. Put in mind though that we aren’t telling victims to maintain a very low self-esteem and confidence in order to heal. The message we are trying to deliver is that they should be able to understand that improving their confidence is not the sole means of healing the wounds of the abuse and eventually overcoming the trauma. What’s needed is acceptance. have I been assaulted

By accepting what has truly happened, victims may begin understanding how important it is for them to recall that day and start building confidence by telling themselves that it will never again consume their lives and their future. They need help and they can get it from people they trust or from those trained to help them. Surviving a child sexual abuse experience is not about making and building coping strategies to temporarily get rid of the pain and trauma. It is more on completely healing the wounds by facing the experience all over again and getting rid of it.

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Victims of child sexual abuse find themselves grieving and mourning about what happened to them. This is a common and natural feeling felt by those who survive the ordeal. While most of us perceive grief as a negative reaction or response in dealing with the consequences and further effects of the actual abuse, it is in reality a very practical and effective way of moving on. sexually assaulted hamilton

The grief felt in child sexual abuse is commonly referred to as the grieving of the loss of innocence. As a child or teen is abused, the innocence is taken away and there’s always the possibility that the entire childhood will be gone. The very purpose of being a young boy or girl is that you get to enjoy exploring life with your innocence. But as it is taken away from you, your entire life and future may also be put in jeopardy.

In the entirety of our lives, we feel grief from time to time. Losing a loved one or a close friend entails grieving. Failures and problems also enable us to grieve. But when a child is sexually abused, the kind of grieving attached to it is far more serious and difficult to handle. Nonetheless, it is still necessary in order for victims to survive and move on. sexual abuse helpline

When a victim grieves, there are several stages involved. It includes the stage of being shocked and immobilized, denial, depression, and acceptance. Depending primarily on what kind of culture or society the victim belongs, getting through each stage may be quite difficult or even unsuccessful. For instance, all child victims of sexual abuse will undergo shock. Being at this stage of grieving means they seem to be incapable of responding or even doing anything. They place themselves in a scenario where they are left with no choice but to get immobilized. In this period, the whole experience has not sunk in.

As they start to realize that they’ve been abused, denial normally follows. Denial includes the inability to accept that the abuse really took place. It’s a feeling where victims try hard to build a mindset that the sexual abuse does not inflict pain and suffering, when in fact, it does. Of all the stages of grieving, denial is the one that can halt the progress of healing and moving on. If the victim keeps on denying what has happened, he will never move on. He will be constantly reminded of the abuse years after it took place. Soon, psychological and behavioral effects will take their toll. have I been assaulted

But as soon as victims learn to fight off the trauma and begin the healing, acceptance follows. Acceptance corresponds to the victims’ ability to allow others to help them. By accepting that the abuse indeed took place and has significantly affected their lives, they are able to come up with coping and healing solutions that will ease the wounds. ptsd sexual abuse

Everyone should be reminded that victims of child sexual abuse normally get the feeling of losing what could have been a better life and future ahead. However, dwelling with what happened in the past will only make things worse. But if they allow themselves to grieve on it in a positive way, there is always a chance to start a new beginning. As you will see, there are stages involved in grieving, so if a victim fails to progress and stay stuck with one of those stages, then there will be no healing. Every victim should realize that the main purpose why they grieve is to learn to accept what happened. If they can do that, healing becomes a lot easier.

Shame is a definite part of the pain of child sexual abuse. Most of the time, people who get caught experiencing the trauma of childhood abuse become different persons right after the experience. While the abuse itself makes them feel shattered and incomplete, the corresponding feeling of shame makes them alter the kind of person they used to be. sexually assaulted hamilton

The shame of being sexually abused as a child is a common sentiment for many of the victims. However, this doesn’t entail that they should just be allowed to feel this way. In fact, many people who carry this emotion try to redeem their self-worth by making material accomplishments in life. Not all survivors of child sexual abuse become abusers when they grow up. There are also those who have endured living a life in complete denial of what happened to them. They become successful in obtaining material possession, wealth, power, and prestige. But have they actually healed the wounds of the past?

There are a lot of times when the feeling of shame overshadows the will to heal and recover. This happens when victims refuse to get help and be healed because they are too afraid to tell others that they were abused. And the reason why they are afraid to disclose it is simply because of the fear of embarrassment and rejection. Victims have this kind of wrong perception that the world around them may not be able to accept them as who they are and what they have suffered. They think that if their friends, family, and relatives find out that they were abused, they will be misjudged and looked down upon. sexual abuse helpline

Sadly for majority of child sexual abuse survivors, life will never be the same. If they continue to let the feeling of shame govern them, no single type of accomplishment in life, be it material or power, will erase the hidden wounds of the past. As long as they continue to be afraid that other people will view them negatively, they will always be haunted by that same experience many years back.

Because of the feeling of shame, victims numb the pain by themselves. But the problem is, they begin to self-destruct by the time they try to contain the aching flashbacks of the actual abuse. They are in desperate need of help and someone to talk to, but they are simply holding it back because the fear of embarrassment, humiliation, and shame is always there lingering in their minds. The consequence is that they will likely resort to means that can temporarily flush out the painful memories. This includes the use and dependence towards drugs and alcohol. As soon as they become addicted, their lives are shattered. have I been assaulted

Although there exist a lot of counseling and recovery programs out there, victims who fall prey and succumb to the feeling of shame will never reach the stage of healing. They will be put in a stage where there is no progress. Even if they manage to hide the childhood sexual abuse experience to others, the memories of it will never cease to exist in their minds as long as they fail to face and fight it.

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Despair is one of the most common and traditional effects of child sexual abuse and assault. It is manifested by the unfortunate and sudden lose of hope by the victim towards life in general. While some may not show signs of despair right after the consummation of the abuse, majority of them will certainly show symptoms in the latter portion of their lives. sexually assaulted hamilton

The sense of helplessness and the lack of will to move on will eventually consume the entire life and future of a victim. For those who have endured and survived, having flashbacks and painful memory recalls are very common. Those images that linger in the minds will continue to haunt them, even years after the actual abuse. For them, it becomes the main source of their anxiety and stress.

Despair is defined as the state of hopelessness. When a child is sexually abused, there is a strong tendency towards pessimism and negative attitude. Victims begin to feel that because of the abuse, their lives are totally changed for the worse. What they have been through is even unimaginable for many. Thus, we can say that a deep sense of despair is just a natural and instinctive reaction for anyone who has been subjected to sexual abuse. sexual abuse helpline

For victims, life in general is like a shattered glass. Being in a constant state of despair and hopelessness may unfortunately lead to further consequences like the cycle of abuse, re-victimization, self-abuse, and even suicidal tendencies. The mind and emotion of a victim are so fragile that they think of themselves as having no worth at all.

This cloud of hopelessness will prevent them from recovering and healing. Even though the abuse took place long time ago, there is no guarantee that it will cease to affect them as they grow older. In fact, majority of victims are inflicted with long term consequences of child sexual abuse such as post traumatic disorders, substance and alcohol abuse, and behavioral and mental problems. have I been assaulted

The most unfortunate thing about despair is the fact that it can lead to a high level of depression. Depression in turn may become the trigger factor for victims to harm themselves or perhaps take their own lives. Bear in mind that it is an emotion based on the idea that they no longer live a good and promising life. Thus, it becomes justifiable to end it.

In the end, it must be pointed out that although despair is something that comes naturally after experiencing child sexual abuse, it should not as well be tolerated. Victims must be able to fight it, or at least let others help them fight it. There is a good chance of eliminating the problem of negative emotions for good when there are people who are willing to help and if victims themselves find it worth to ask for it.

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Child sexual abuse results to severe and even life threatening consequences for the victims. Because of the physical, emotional, and psychological trauma inflicted, many of them are not able to live normal lives again. The suffering is an obvious manifestation of how crucial and important it is to support and help victims pull through, move on, and heal the wounds of that painful experience. sexually assaulted hamilton

Much of the wound and scars of the sexual abuse will remain even after the victim reaches adulthood. While some are able to endure and survive the trauma, others succumb to it. And the very reason why many victims are not able to cope up is because they lack the support from all people including their families, authorities, help and advocacy groups, and even themselves.

The first thing one should understand in providing support to child sexual abuse victims is the reality that most victims are not stable enough to cooperate or participate in the healing process. Therapies involve experts, but bear in mind that these experts are considered strangers by the victim and it can become pretty hard to get them to cooperate. sexual abuse helpline

Victims of child sexual abuse including their family are the ones who need support, therapy, and counseling in order to heal the wounds. They need some place where they get to meet fellow victims and correspond with them. Though it may seem odd, letting victims bond together will give positive healing results because each of them become much more comfortable with each other since they share the same sentiment, experience, and suffering.

If it isn’t possible, another good and effective way of helping victims is by building a network of close and supportive people. There are a lot of instances where expert therapists cannot do the job, simply because the victim does not want it. In this case, enlisting the help of people who the victim knows and are familiar with such as family members, relatives, close friends, and even support group composed of teachers and religious ministers will be best achieved. Victims are more comfortable sharing their story to people who they can trust, especially in those times that building trust to someone they don’t know becomes almost impossible to do. have I been assaulted

But among all the many options available to treat victims of child sexual abuse, there is no better way than empowering and giving them strength to face whatever consequence they get out of the suffering. As a caring and concerned family member or friend, you must be there to emphasize to him/her the importance of facing and fighting off the pain. Healing is not possible if victims continue to deny and fear everything that’s happened to them.

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Children are supposed to be the most unlikely victims of sexual abuse. We all have seen various cases of sexual abuse in the form of rape, molestation, assault, and even harassment. And though we try to deny it, it actually becomes relieving to find out that the victim is an adult. But if abuse is carried out against an innocent child, that’s another thing. bopsass

Sexual abuse is overpoweringly traumatic for such a guiltless and fragile mind. Children are born to be vulnerable, that’s why they need their parents to be always there by their side until they grow up. They lack the ability to defend themselves and understand their rights. Because of this, they also become very easy targets for sex offenders and pedophiles.

By the time they experience the actual sexual abuse, the negative effects keep coming in. Not only are their bodies subjected to pain, their entire lives are also devastated. The level of trauma brought by the abuse will result to different consequences that may not appear instantly. Though we don’t realize it, majority of the effects actually appear years after – that’s when the survivors reach adulthood. Some of it includes post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, drug addiction, and various types of behavioral/emotional problems. bay of plenty sexual harm support

Nonetheless, this does not mean that there are no immediate consequences. In fact, a lot of child victims of sexual abuse may also manifest signs of it right after it took place. Of course, the most obvious sign would be the physical marks and injuries. Many child offenders hurt their victims. Inflicting pain is a show of dominance. It seeks to impose fear unto the child – a way of saying that the offender can hurt her if she tries to fight back or resist. Physical pain is a sign of sexual abuse which is responsible for alleviating the overall trauma suffered by the victim.

Another sign of sexual abuse is the inappropriate knowledge and behavior of the child towards sex. This can be manifested in two ways. The first one happens when the victim starts to become very elusive and withdrawn from other people, even close friends and family. This child suddenly avoids any form of common physical contact with an adult such as holding hands, hugging mom, or sitting at dad’s lap. This may be caused by the memory of the abuse. Someone must have laid their hands to the child that the child felt very awkward, or perhaps painful, that she deems any kind of physical contact from other people as similar to it. The second one is a sudden outburst of knowledge about sex. If you happen to hear your six-year old talk about sex and related issues, then someone may be feeding him information. You have to hope at this point that he hasn’t had physical contact with the offender yet because teaching children about sex is a grooming process used by offenders in order for them to agree on sexual favors in the future. sexual abuse tauranga

Furthermore, child victims of sexual abuse will definitely become confused right after they are abused. Confusion is built around different forms of emotions such as fear, anger, panic, and self-blame. The victim becomes confused for the simple reason that she doesn’t know what actually happened to her. At one instance, fear consumes her, especially when the pain and the wounds are still fresh. She cannot get the face of the offender out of her mind. By the time the physical pain subsides, anger soon gets in. Victims naturally become angry not only to the offender, but to those people who they think did not help them. There have been hundreds of cases where survivors become withdrawn to their families because they blame them for not being there.

Panic happens when victims feel that they should do something about it but they really don’t know how to start. While some try to erase and forget the memories, others try to courageously face it. Unfortunately for them, there’s a good chance that they will lost hope, and even sanity, that they begin to use drugs and alcohol in order to temporarily wipe off the painful memory. And in no time they become totally fed up in blaming others while the trauma and pain remain within them. This is the period when self-blame takes place. A victim may think of herself as someone who deserves it or someone who was born to be abused. sexual assault tauranga

Finally, we come upon the conclusion that sexual abuse does nothing but harm to the victims. Although many have survived the ordeal, there are still a lot out there that need our help in understanding what should be done in order for them to survive as well. Even if the signs we just mentioned are very troubling to know, there is always a way in order to fight them back.

Depression and despair are two emotional conditions that can totally break apart the life and future of a victim of child sexual abuse. The question of how far can victims go in inflicting pain onto themselves is quite difficult to deal with but no matter how harsh the truth is, we have to know it to prevent it from happening again. sexually assaulted hamilton

Depression is the totality of negative feelings victims feel as a consequence of the sexual abuse they received as a child. While most of the signs of depression do not surface right after the experience, there’s always a great chance that the same will manifest as the victims grow older.

The reason why most child sexual abuse survivors feel depressed and despaired is because they failed to deal with it before. Most of them choose to keep the experience to themselves for the fear of retaliation, embarrassment, and shame. They were able to live a life of denial – secretly hiding the fact that they have been truly hurt, both physically and mentally. By not getting any help from other people including family and experts, they unknowingly build up several negative attitudes and behavior. sexual abuse helpline

In a short period of time, victims begin to realize that they need help. However, the hope of recovering and healing seemed to be unfeasible anymore considering that a great amount of time has passed. And because of that, the only thing that they can practically do is get depressed. As they suffer from a great amount of despair and hopelessness, they realize that their lives are not worth it.

There are several reasons why children fail or just avoid dealing with the sexual abuse at the very time it happened. As a natural way of responding to the traumatic experience, they may elect to keep it a secret because of certain emotions such as disbelief and shame. As much as they want to, they seem to be totally hesitant in asking for help since disclosing it may very well worsen what they already feel. have I been assaulted

As the worse comes to worst, a deep level of depression and despair can finally result to self-inflicted injury and physical symptoms. We know for a fact that there are several effects of child sexual abuse. Some are minor while most result to major long term medical and psychological consequences. For instance, severe cases of depression and despair can lead to eating disorders, panic attacks, substance and alcohol abuse, personality and behavioral problems, and even suicidal tendencies. ptsd sexual abuse

Now if any of these effects surface, there’s a good chance that the victims’ health and life are put risk. At this point, it is very sad and unfortunate to see that they suffer the most, considering that they should’ve been taken care of right after the sexual abuse happened. So if we ask ourselves again, how far can a victim go with the feeling of despair and desperation? At this particular type of condition, they may be capable of hurting, much more, killing themselves.

Guilt is one of the most familiar effects of child molestation and sexual abuse. Most if not all victims suffer this same type of emotion as a result or part of the overall trauma of the experience. While there are other negative signs and consequences of CSA, guilt is one of the few that’s really difficult to deal with and overcome. sexual abuse helpline

Every survivor or victim must realize that it is crucial to understand why they feel guilty even though the abuse was not their fault. Understanding means facing the reality that they have been abused instead of denying it both to themselves and to other people. The feeling of guilt must be addressed for the reason that it can inflict more pain and suffering in the life and future of the victims if they continue to ignore it.

Whenever victims feel guilty about themselves, every possible reason or explanation behind this emotion can be considered as instinctive or a common and natural emotional response. For example, a CSA victim may feel responsible for what happened to her because the abuser always reminded her that both of them agreed to it. Others meanwhile are blamed by the abuser as having the qualities that made them vulnerable to sexual abuse and molestation. While both of these “grooming” techniques are entirely untrue, young victims are made to believe they are. Child sex offenders and abusers are very good at poisoning the minds of their victims to the extent that years after the abuse, they still blame themselves and feel guilty about the experience. have I been assaulted

Fighting the feeling of guilt is never an easy task for victims to perform. In fact, a lot of them cannot even dare facing the truth. Probably more than half of CSA cases are not reported because victims are afraid or ashamed to disclose or reveal them. One reason for the hesitance is the feeling of guilt. Victims believe that whenever they try to tell others about it, the latter will likely abandon, curse, look down, and simply ignore them. At this point, victims begin to think that what happened to them is actually their fault and they should be guilty about it.

In reality though, every survivor of CSA should not feel culpable about what happened to them. We should all remember that the molestation took place without their proper consent or against their will. It really doesn’t matter if it was carried out by means of force, coercion, deception, or manipulation – the only thing that matters is that they were abused. Victims must realize that since it happened when they were very young, they’ve got no control of the situation. If they ever wanted to fight, there’s no chance for them to stop it. The only thing that can prevent the abuse is if the offender suddenly shows remorse, but that’s highly unlikely for a sexual psychopath like a pedophile. ptsd sexual abuse

Nonetheless, erasing guilt and eventually healing the wounds of the abuse would not be possible if there is no help and support from the people who care. The road to recovery starts with acceptance. Through it, child sexual abuse victims can start to build strength and eliminate the feeling of shame and guilt within them. As long as there are people who see them as powerful and strong individuals and not as unworthy and pitiful, they will realize that life did not actually end when they were abused; in fact, it is rather an opportunity to start a new and fresh beginning.

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The trauma brought by the experience of child sexual abuse is so overwhelming that victims can do nothing but lose hope, courage, and self-belief. It is so easy for sex offenders and abusers to carry out what they do, but it becomes very difficult and painful for the victims to accept the unfortunate situation they have been into. sexually assaulted hamilton

The most disturbing thing about children sexually abused is the fact that almost all of them grow up carrying the painful memories of the past. What happens next is that they start to manifest unwanted effects from it. The effects in return can be in different forms – from behavioral problems, cycle of abuse, to drug and alcohol addiction. But whatever the result of the abuse is, one thing is for sure: these ill-fated individuals should not be blamed. Every single victim did not deserve it. sexual abuse helpline

Now if we try to dig deep on common and natural responses of the victims, one feeling stands out – despair. This kind of emotional tendency happens when you lose hope on yourself. For victims of sexual abuse, it is very likely that they will turn their back against everyone. They would feel as if no one is there to help them and that they deserved what happened to them. This kind of mentality then leads to the idea that hoping to have a normal life and a bright future isn’t possible anymore. What they have created onto themselves is a cloud of hopelessness. They feel like it’s the end of the world by the time the offender laid his hands on them. have I been assaulted

We know that the virtue called hope is the one that teaches us to look at the future on a positive note. But if you were abused at such a young age, it can be pretty to positively look at the future ahead. Instead, you become depressed and the pain of the abuse will always be with you as long as you tolerate it. For some, what happened to them is purely destiny. They have come to accept that they were brought into this world to be abused. But of course, that’s not true. ptsd sexual abuse

Victims must think of the experience as a trial. There have been lots of cases that have been transformed into success stories. Each survivor should think that being sexually abused as a child is not a hindrance to what ambition they have for in the future. By allowing themselves to be consumed by despair and depression, they are simply telling their abusers that they have succeeded in ruining their young lives.